The Velvet Rocket

Given the popularity of the first Tattoo Madness post, I decided another one was due…

Tattoo Madness – Part 1

So, without any further introduction, here are the Tattoo Madness – Part 2 results in no particular order.

I don’t think any of us had a perfect childhood, but… Really?

Why we don’t let our friends give us tattoos:

Did this guy just give Papa Smurf a blowjob? Makes sense actually if you consider the male to female ratio in the Smurf community.

This tongue tattoo below is a bit better. You know, if you think about how much it hurts when you accidentally bite your tongue, think of how much getting a tongue tattoo must hurt…

And this one looks even better, but is probably Photoshopped.

A good anatomy lesson. This tattoo educates and entertains:

Here’s something else you could do with your arms:

Does this mean she is a moron and has nothing to say?

I never thought of turning the sketches I made in my notebook when I was bored in class into a tattoo, but this guy apparently did:

Well, it’s creative…

Can you imagine getting ready to have sex with a girl and suddenly encountering this if you were not expecting it? Neither can I.

I have to confess that I’ve never thought of having a chili dog tattooed on me.

Nor a bloody tampon with wings…

Maybe if her skin wasn’t rippling with cellulite and wasn’t blindingly white, I could muster an appreciation for this. But, under the present circumstances, I’m afraid not.

And this chick could be attractive, if she weren’t so covered in shit.

OK, so what happens when the vampire fad dies down a bit? People will think she has scabies or smallpox or worse.

Now, I thought this was pretty damn clever. These guys concealed their hair loss, by shaving their heads and tattooing hair in:

Not a shocking tattoo, but I thought it looked pretty cool.

Damn…

I know these aren’t tattoos, but fucking hell…

I’m struggling to understand the appeal of a series of tattoos that make it look like you got your ass kicked. So many people are willing to do the real thing for free.

Any cat lovers in the audience?

How very inviting.

Interesting.

Imagine, this is someone’s grandma…

God, and so is this!

I can see where he’s coming from. It always was the most fun to watch the girl fights in school.

I wonder how this guy would do in a job interview with this tattoo?

Probably better than this guy – one of the creepiest people I have ever seen.

So, the picture on the left is simply of this guy’s back, but if you look closely you will see that the tattoos on the right are on his eyelids and are not actually his eyes.

Rather subtle and clever.

Man, does anyone out there think this guy ever gets laid?

Just to remind you, dear readers, tattoos are permanent.

This made me think of My Little Pony differently.

The Japanese are funny, huh?

As always, I must give a nod of appreciation to the Yakuza though.

Awwwww, did someone not get enough attention from mummy and daddy?

It still amazes me that people voluntarily do this to themselves.

Unclassifiable.

Well, “Mr. Cool Ice” may have given us the world’s stupidest tattoos, but this may well be the world’s worst tattoo. Seriously, a retarded three-year-old could do a better job. And has anyone else noticed the correlation between waist size and bad tattoos?

Not that there is any shortage of stupid tattoos to reflect upon.

Seriously, what was this guy thinking?

Keepin’ it real with the black widows…

Well, after so much stupidity and/or negativity, I feel compelled to end on a positive note:

For continued pleasure, be sure to check out…

Tattoo Madness – Part 1

and

Tattoo Madness – Part 3

and

Tattoo Madness Part 4: The Shock and Awe Edition