The Velvet Rocket

Entries from June 2009

Gary Gabelich

June 27, 2009 · 10 Comments

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One of my childhood heroes was Gary Gabelich and I always wanted to know more about him.  So, I decided to finally get around to this project and to post the results of my research.

Gary Gabelich was born on August 29, 1940 in San Pedro, California although he was of Croatian descent.  He began drag racing in his father’s Pontiac in 1957 while still in high school, winning the stock eliminator drag racing class at Santa Ana, California in his first competition.  This was shortly followed by winning  the world’s first side-by-side jet dragster race, at over 250 mph.  Allegedly, at just nineteen he reached a speed of 356 mph on the Bonneville Salt Flats in Utah while operating a jet car, probably a record for a teenager.

During this period of his life, Gary was a delivery driver for Vermillion’s Drug Store, driving a split window 1960s-era VW Kombi delivery van.  He lived at that time in the Bixby Knolls area of Long Beach, California with his parents.  Following the job as a delivery driver, he went to work for North American Aviation in Downey, California (later to merge with Rockwell-Standard in 1967 and become North American Rockwell), starting out in the mail room.  Gary ended up staying with North American Rockwell for 9 years in various positions from staff assistant to part-time test subject for the Apollo program—not flying the capsules, but testing their long-term liveability in a weightless condition, their tolerance to and performance under conditions of extreme yaw and, though they seldom spoke of it on televised moon shots, the toilet facilities.  Although I have been unable to verify this information, I have seen several sources mention that Gary started working his way up the ladder at North American Rockwell when he volunteered to perform the free falls from 30,000 feet needed to film some of the early Apollo space capsule landing trials – makes sense if you consider his personality as a lover of high speeds and dangerous challenges. 

During his tenure at North American Rockwell, Gary Gabelich established a name for himself at drag strips across Southern California (Winning the first United Drag Racing Association in 1963 and being the first man to break into drag racing’s seven second bracket, driving a Double A Fuel dragster at 7.05 seconds, in 1967.  In 1969, he drove the Beach City Chevrolet Corvette funny car to speeds over 200 mph, a first for a Chevrolet funny car).  Many racers and race fans, in fact, worked day jobs at aerospace companies across Southern California.  However, Gary’s employers at North American Rockwell, fearing the investment of too much time and unique training in a research subject who, it seemed to them, was laying his life and the continuity of their research on the starting line every weekend, gave him the ultimatum: “Cease this foolhardy diversion or forfeit your job.” There was never really any question about the response. The choice was made for him by his dedication to the world he loved and his desire to prevail in it.

It was a crucial moment in the life of Gary Gabelich as he would move on to greater glory for which he became a household name – fastest man in the world.  A claim he was able to make by setting the land speed record with his rocket-powered vehicle “Blue Flame” on October 23, 1970 , achieving an average speed of 622.287 mph (1,001.474 km/h). And a peak speed of 650 mph (1,050 km/h) was momentarily attained (record speed was 622.407 mph (1,001.667 km/h) on a dry lake bed at Bonneville Salt Flats in Wendover, Utah. This record was the first over 1,000 km/h (621 mph) and remained unbeaten until 1983, when Richard Noble broke it driving Thrust 2.

It was a rather lucky turn of events that handed this opportunity to Gary…

Reaction Dynamics, Inc., a company formed by Pete Farnsworth, Ray Dausman and Dick Keller who had developed hydrogen peroxide rocket dragsters, was looking for a driver about that time for the Blue Flame, a 37-foot-long, 4,950-pound vehicle powered by a liquid natural gas-hydrogen peroxide rocket engine.  Constructed in Milwaukee, Wisconsin the Blue Flame was sponsored by the American Gas Association, with technical assistance from the Institute of Gas Technology of Des Plaines, Illinois.  Craig Breedlove, holder of the land speed record at the time, wanted too much money. And a drag racer, named Chuck Suba, came to terms with Reaction Dynamics but was killed in a racing accident shortly thereafter. Gabelich was the third choice, and he jumped at the chance.

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The Blue Flame’s run for the land speed record at Bonneville was originally scheduled for September of 1969, but it was then postponed indefinitely. The first attempt finally took place a year later, on September 22, 1970. It was a dismal failure, reaching a speed of only 426 mph compared to Craig Breedlove’s five-year-old record of 600.601 mph. A lot of tinkering and testing was to follow.

Gabelich hit 609 mph on the first of two mandatory runs on October 15, but a mechanical problem prevented the required return run. The same thing happened on October 23, when the first run reached 621 mph. Finally, on October 28, Gabelich and the Blue Flame averaged 617.602 mph on the first run and 627.207 on the second for a new land speed record of 622.407.

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He said afterward that he thought the Blue Flame might be able to reach 750 mph, beyond the sound barrier. But Reaction Dynamics had no more plans for the Blue Flame and Gabelich went back to drag racing.

Gary Gabelich’s right hand was severed in a racing accident ( in an experimental 4WD Funny Car) early in 1972, but it was able to be reattached.  I have seen it reported that this accident ruined his professional racing prospects, but he still was able to take second place in Mickey Thompson’s off-road race at Riverside, California in 1975; first place in the Toyota Charity Slalom at the Rose Bowl in 1979 and second place in the Toyota Pro Challenge Race at the Michigan International Speedway in July, 1980.

And, although he was best known for his land speed exploits, Gary was also into going fast on water.  Gabelich won both the American Power Boat Association Blown Fuel and Gas National Drag Boat Championship (1968) and was the first person to win them both in the same year.  He was also the first person to surpass 200 mph in a drag boat – a feat accomplished in 1969.  In 1975 at Turlock Lake in California, a drag boat piloted by Gary Gabelich disintegrated at 180 mph.

After twice narrowly escaping death in dragster and boat accidents, Gary Gabelich tragically died in a motorcycle accident in Long Beach, California on January 26th, 1984.  According to the police, Gabelich was riding his motorcycle “at a high rate of speed” when he ran into the right side of a truck. Gabelich died nearly three hours later at San Pedro Hospital of injuries suffered in the accident, the police said.

Gabelich, who was 43-years-old at the time of his death, had his land speed record mark stand for 13 years before Richard Noble hurtled his Thrust 2 up to 633.407 mph on the Black Rock Desert in northern Nevada on October 4, 1983. Just two months later Gary Gabelich was fatally injured in his motorcycle accident and never had the chance to reply to Noble’s heroics.

In 1985 the Long Beach City Council named a park in his memory, Gabelich Park.

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Below is a collection of some of the memories of Gary from Blue Flame crew member, Paul Stringer, as well as a profile published in Sports Illustrated.  I think they provide a great insight into the spirit and character of Gary Gabelich:

Blue Flame crew member, Paul Stringer:

“Gary was very upset when the car [Blue Flame] was sold because he wanted to attempt a sound barrier run with the car. In 1970 when they raced it, they had many mishaps. The most damning was they burned out the retro in the rocket and had to get a loaner or a gift motor to finish. As I remember the original rocket had about 40,000 pounds of thrust and the actual motor they used to set the record had about 14,000. That would lead you to believe that the car could go much faster given the space limitations of the Salt Flats, and the ground effects of going supersonic.

I can’t even describe how many hours we spent talking about where the air goes (under the car). Would the air flip the car when supersonic “splits the air?” They talked at great length about lengthening the rod on the front tip of the car to split the air farther out in front to prevent any negative effects. Craig Breedlove was a very close friend of Gary’s and he as well was always helpful in helping Gary advance his efforts. Craig and Gary where from the same town in California and I met Craig in 1966 on a water skiing trip. Most would think that they would be strange bedfellows when Gary got picked to drive the car, but Craig was one of his biggest supporters and fans.

Gary was trying to figure out how to stop the new car going supersonic also.

The problems are: no air for chutes and brakes won’t work over 400MPH. He was working on a splitting tail like the Space Shuttle and body panels that popped out. Of course, he never considered running anywhere but the flats.

Gary’s feelings about the car being sold was this: the car was owned by the Natural Gas Association as a publicity stunt. When the car got the record, they received millions of dollars in promotion which they never could have bought. They never saw it as a race car and felt that a return to the flats and the risk of an accident would become negative publicity. Hence, the car was sold.

Gary even pursued contacting the new car owner about another run. Apparently, the car had been dropped while being off loaded from a ship when it left the country and there was some tweaking of the frame and that ended his interest.

Gary then began trying to raise sponsors for a new car he’d named The American Way. While he raised some eyebrows at the time, he raised no money for the project as interest in the LSR had waned by then. This was in 1979 nine years after the last true attempt and he wasn’t breaking another guy‘s record; he would only be raising his mark and sponsors wondered how much interest this would raise. To raise the interest, he and Craig Breedlove stated they’d create some new interest by building two cars and they’d “drag race” for the record on the flats. Wow, a 700MPH drag race! Of course, Craig would have to change his thinking to a rocket as a Jet vs. Rocket race would be no race in a drag event the best I can remember is something like 0 to 500 in 10 seconds (more than a few G forces).

One of the reasons Gary was chosen to drive the car (Blue Flame) was because his full time job was he worked for Rockwell International in Downey, California as a “Test Astronaut.” He tested all the space suits for the Apollo space missions. This is a glorious title to say he was the guy going around in the centrifuge. He was used to a lot of G forces, they were always concerned that the driver would blackout during acceleration.

As far as Gary’s life being cut short, while we all miss him lots, few of us could picture him dying an old man. Gary’s life was lived on the edge from the time he was 15 years old. Gary started racing by cleaning up the grease/oil mess for some kids in his neighborhood who had a drag car. He did this for a few years on the promise that someday they‘d let him drive it at the drag strip. That day came when he was 15, on the first pass he went faster than any run ever in the car. One year later, he had his own car and became a legend in California drag racing. He was the ultimate crowd-pleaser being a lot “nuts & wild” and being easy to spot as he always wore an ostrich plume on the top of his helmet. He’d love to taunt his competitors on the starting line by shaking his fist and sometimes getting out of his car to yell something. Of course, it was all in good fun and I never met another racer who didn’t love his magnetic personality.

While setting the LSR made Gary infamous, many of his friends consider it a high point in his life that made the rest of his life chasing a dream. After the record, he didn’t know if he was a career LSR car driver or needed to return to his career in Drag Racing. Before his death, he nearly lost his life four times to my count. He flipped a drag boat @ 200MPH and as he went in the water the motor hit him in the back, nearly killing him. His kidneys were badly damaged and he was on dialysis for two years. He had two accidents in the same Funny Car (Beach City Corvette). Once, he lost the chutes and ended up on fire on a freeway and the second accident, the car caught on fire during a run and burned to the ground (he jumped out at over 100MPH). That accident burned holes clear through his goggles and helmet but he had only minor burns to his face and head. The fourth accident was a crash in his own Funny Car. It had 4 wheel drive which made it very fast off the line. On a photo shoot for a magazine, the throttle locked down during a “burn out” and he lost control. At about 160MPH it went through a guard rail twice and flipped end over end.

Gary had one of his hands cut off to the outside skin, one leg was behind his head and one was wrapped around the steering wheel. That leg became the problem. While his hand was re-attached and the leg behind him was dislocated, the surgeons wanted to remove the other leg as it was nothing but shattered bone from the ankle. Gary would not let them remove the leg, so they inserted a long rod to replace the bone. He adapted to the handicap, but spent about a year trying to get rid of gangrene.”

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Sports Illustrated Profile:

The last time anyone paid any special note to the world of absolute speed it was 1970 and Gary Gabelich was going 622.407 miles an hour across Utah’s Bonneville Salt Flats in a rocket car called The Blue Flame

Gary (Rocket Man) Gabelich. You know, the world’s fastest man.

Listening to Gary Gabelich one gets the impression that asking why is what’s really absurd. “Racing is really boss, man. If you like to go fast, that’s all there is.” The idea of the danger involved in traveling 750 miles an hour bubbles up and rolls away from his mind like droplets of water off a fresh coat of Simoniz. “Driving the car is a piece of cake,” he says. “You could do it; almost anyone could. It’s putting the whole project together that’s tough, raising the $1 million we figure it will cost, and then converting it into a car and a team that we know can break the barrier.” He speaks of his team so frequently that he begins to sound like the self-effacing player of the week in a postgame interview or the blushing astronauts giving all the credit for their being on the moon to the technicians of Houston. It is as if strapping his body in a supersonic rocket were no more a commitment and courageous act than trying out the air-conditioned fossil burners in Detroit’s new fall line.

Gabelich is totally into whatever he is doing.

Gabelich’s new sound-barrier car, which is being built in Long Beach, will be 44 feet long, eight feet longer than the current Blue Flame record car, which was sponsored by The Natural Gas Industry. The tail fin will be cut down, the rear wheels set farther back and wider apart, and the underside of the body will be V-shaped. This latter touch is an engineer’s dream: when supercar breaks the sound barrier on land, the shock waves will go off the car at a 45-degree angle downward, hit the ground and bounce away from the car instead of bouncing back up to blow the thing off the ground.

On the wall of Gary’s office there is a cartoon clipped from a newspaper and presented by his girl friend Linda. It shows Hazel, the maid, casing the family’s preadolescent heir standing on a pair of water skis in the backyard plastic wading pool, holding onto a rope attached to the rear bumper of a car. “Have you thought this thing through?” Hazel asks. Gabelich has thought his project through, and his proposed new attempt at the sound barrier, like his previous record runs, is no mere display of mindless fortitude.

A year ago last spring at Orange County International Raceway, Gabelich did get into a car that had not been thoroughly thought through—and the result was a crash that almost ripped off his left forearm and broke his left leg so severely that more than a year later he still wore a cast. “We had rushed the project, and I had bad vibes about it,” he says now. The car was a four-wheel-drive experimental “funny car” (a dragster with the facsimile body of a regular Detroit car), and it careened out of control at 180 miles an hour during a quarter-mile run. “Being in the hospital gave me time to think,” Gabelich says, “and what I thought about mostly was getting back in shape to work on the sound-barrier project.”

Gabelich wants to win at whatever he does. Thus, when he began racing motorcycles he raced under the improbable pseudonym of Orval Volotch. “As holder of the land speed record I’d be expected to win, but I really didn’t know much about that kind of racing. So when I used another name it took all that pressure off and I could have fun.” Still, he finished first among the “pie plates,” the unrated amateurs, in his first desert run.

For Gary Gabelich everything is right now. He is almost totally without introspection and obsessed with doing well, whether water skiing, driving The Blue Flame at more than 600 miles an hour, talking to promoters and potential sponsors or making one of the endless public relations tours for the American Gas Association. “Sometimes I think I’d rather be somewhere else,” he says, “but since I’ve got to be wherever I am, I figure I might as well make a good job of it. I want to be a winner.”

A large part of the pleasure Gabelich takes in his work is directed at firing the enthusiasm of those around him. He frequently begins the day, particularly before a speed-record attempt, by playing Isaac Hayes music to his crew. “It gets everybody in a really good mood and sets up good vibes for what we’ve got to do,” he says.

Categories: People · Speed
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Facial Hair Champions

June 26, 2009 · 2 Comments

With this post I seek to celebrate all that is grand and glorious in the world of facial hair. The worse the beard or mustache, the better. The more over the top, the more I love it. Too extreme is not extreme enough. Let’s see what’s out there…

This guy definitely scores points for the weave action in his beard.  It looks sort of like a woven basket, huh?

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I’ll bet the girls love this one.

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This is a hairy guy:

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But, not as hairy as this guy below.  And by the way, yes, this is real.  It is the result of a genetic defect (Or gift depending on your perspective).

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OK, so these guys were part of a beard and mustache contest and so they worked to be over the top, but their facial hair is still noteworthy.

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I honestly don’t know what to say about this one. But, it needs to be included (obviously).

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How awesome would it be to have this guy as your grandfather?

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This guy gets points for overall hairiness. Does he have lips or a mouth?

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And this guy gets points for, uhhhhh, something…

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Man, these old school guys knew how to rock the facial hair:

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Stellar work, sir.

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This guy scores massive points for utilizing the headband along with the sweet mustache.

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This is just weird looking.  Does anyone else think he looks like an extra from Planet of the Apes?

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I’ll award some points for creativity here.

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Just in case you were worried that celebrities never slip up in their appearance:

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Jesse, seriously, what were you thinking, man?  Oh, right, probably to demonstrate that anyone with the confidence to appear on national television as you look below possesses inherent awesomeness.

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But, Mel, come on, dude…  What look were you going for here? Peter Pan pedophile?

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But, I guess that not all of us can look like Geraldo with his killer mustache.

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What chick would take a guy that looked like this seriously?  And how much work would that be to maintain?

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I’d love to have a beer with this guy.  You can just tell he’s got some great stories.

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I’m impressed.  Seriously impressed.

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I came across this pic because this guy goes around in public like this.  Some kids made fun of him and he beat the shit out of them.  Way to stand up for facial hair awesomeness, sir.

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This guy scores points for his douchey appearance alone – but also for his lame facial hair.

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This guy picks up some points for overall hair thickness.  That is one thick mustache.

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Excellent work.  A real artist at work here.

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Somehow the hat makes it all come together.

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One of the best mustaches yet.

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Very, uhhhh, organic.

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I think this guy looks like a blowfish.

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And speaking of disgusting, for some reason I find this absolutely repulsive.

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But not this… This guy is awesome.  Truly awesome. I salute you, sir.

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For some reason the receding hairline amplifies the awesomeness of this guy’s mustache by like a factor of ten.

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This guy has got to be the facial hair champ though – the incorporation of the chest hair and neck hair is absolutely brilliant. I love it.

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There is still a final frontier in facial hair awesomeness though. I have yet to see either of the following two and I cannot say that the human race has reached its full potential until I see the fuzzy lips or full neck beard.

A: Fuzzy lips – this would be someone that was clean-shaven, but left a perfect ring of hair right around their lips. Admittedly bad, but I think the next one would be even worse…

B: Full neck beard and nothing else. This would involve someone with a completely clean-shaven face, but a thick, bushy beard on their neck only. How punk rock would that be?

Does anyone else have any ideas?

These gems remain untested and unproven. Does anyone have the courage to grab the torch of greatness and take things beyond over the top? I certainly hope so.

Categories: Art · People
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Stalin Line Military Complex, Belarus

June 25, 2009 · 1 Comment

The original Stalin Line was a line of fortifications along the western border of the Soviet Union. Work began on the system in the 1920s to protect the USSR against “western aggression.” The line was made up of fortified bunkers and gun emplacements, similar but less elaborate than the Maginot Line (and equally ineffective).

Following the Molotov-Ribbentrop Pact, which expanded the borders of the USSR westward in 1939 and 1940, into Poland, the Baltic, and Bessarabia the decision was made to abandon the line in favor of constructing the so-called Molotov Line further west, along the new border of the USSR. A number of Russian generals felt that it would be better to keep both lines and have defense in depth, but this conflicted with the pre-World War II Soviet military doctrine. And given the pace of Stalin’s purges, no one was particularly enthusiastic about coming out forcefully against orders from above.

Thus the guns were moved, but were mostly in storage as the new line began construction. The 1941 German invasion caught the Soviets with their pants down as the new line was unfinished and the Stalin Line largely abandoned and in disrepair. Thus, neither was of much use in stopping the onslaught of Operation Barbarossa.

Following World War II, the Stalin Line was not maintained, in part due to its wide dispersal across the USSR. Unlike in Western Europe, where similar fortifications were demolished for development and safety reasons, much of the line survived beyond the breakup of the USSR in 1991 due to simply being ignored. Today, the remains are located in Belarus, Finland, Lithuania, Moldova, Poland, Romania, Russia and Ukraine.

Although the Stalin Line itself in no longer operational, there is still a significant military complex located along a piece of the Line in Belarus. Given the history of the Stalin Line, Nigel and Andy and I headed out to take a look and to see if we might have any luck getting to interview soldiers in the area and to get some good video footage for the Discovery Channel (for whom we were filming after they lent us one of their cameras).

This was our first look at the military base – which led us to consider sneaking on…

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…But then after getting a closer look at the security in place…

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…And being confronted by this guard, we decided it would be far more prudent not to attempt such a move.  So, instead, we decided to try to bribe our way onto the base.

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We ambled over to the main entrance and following a fairly brief, but awkward, conversation with these guards (below) and after handing over a thick stack of Belorussian rubles (not worth that much), we were in.

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We headed over to the remnants of the Stalin Line first. It is still maintained here and provides security to this side of the base.

Down in one of the trenches.

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A gun emplacement protected by barbed wire, armor and reinforced concrete.

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Tank traps.

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I think some of the guards were rather surprised to see us just wandering around, but I can’t really blame them.

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It also didn’t stop us from heading down into the bunker complex though.

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A space can be opened here, allowing the defenders of the Stalin Line (now the base) to pour destruction and death into the valley below.

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And there is plenty of lighter firepower available inside as well.

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I have no idea what this guy was saying to us, but he didn’t seem happy we were down there. So, I took his picture.

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One of the guards at the main gate (whom we bribed to get in) spoke enough English to convey to us (aside from his being able to negotiate our entrance “fee”) that there was a site in the valley below the military complex where a battle had taken place between German and Soviet forces during World War II that was worth seeing. Apparently, the Germans were overconfident about the safety of the area and had a convoy attacked.  It was amazing to see so much of this stuff just laying around as it was left so many decades ago.  Thank God for Communist neglect.  In a Western country, this would have been tidied up and cleared away.

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You can still clearly see the German Iron Cross on the side of this tank.

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Symbolic American domination of both World War II and the Cold War?

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An old boy who had seen us bribe our way onto the base (and emphatically did not want his picture taken) approached us as we were returning from the battle site pictured above. Seeing that we were interested in the military equipment, and since we had already proved ourselves to be shady characters by paying our way into the military complex, he apparently felt comfortable with us. The man communicated that everything we could see around us was for sale at the right price and started selling us on the various equipment and weapons systems.

The sales lot:

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And the sales office:

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Leading us inside to talk business and show us more products:

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And it was a nice, cozy place to do business indeed – even equipped with a woodstove.

All manner of ammunition, explosives and light weapons systems were stored in here.  And all of it was for sale.  Bunkers like this are ground zero for the proliferation of former Eastern bloc weapons into the conflicts of the developing world.

It takes a lot to shock me these days, but even I was shocked at how easy it would have been to leave with a crate of hand grenades or AK-47s.  Or a MiG fighter jet if we’d had enough money…

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Here is a sampling of some of the heavier equipment we were offered such as missile systems, fighter jets and helicopter gunships:

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Imagine how much possession of a Hind helicopter gunship would enhance my latent plans to seize control, via a coup d’ etat, of a basket case African country!

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Categories: Belarus · Travel
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Visiting Bratislava

June 15, 2009 · 2 Comments

Bratislava, Slovakia Report # 1

I have found that countries for which I have low expectations before visiting have always wildly exceeded my expectations and have proved remarkably enjoyable, while countries that are supposed to be enjoyed and that I am supposed to like, invariably disappoint me. Slovakia, and Bratislava in particular, fall into the first category. Bratislava was almost an afterthought for me before we arrived, given that my Italian interpreter and I had a break of only 18 hours between returning from a significant trip to the United States and leaving for Slovakia. But now, I must rank Bratislava as one of my favorite European cities.

The transportation network in Slovakia is first-rate and so one can get around easily. And given Bratislava’s proximity to Vienna, one can be in downtown Vienna in less than an hour from departing Bratislava via train. The cost of a round-trip journey is 9 euros and the ride is comfortable and the views good. If I were able to secure gainful employment in Vienna, I would work there and live in Bratislava as one could earn Western wages in Vienna and then live like a Saudi prince in Bratislava. A quality flat can be found in Bratislava for 30,000 euros and dinner for two at a nice restaurant will only set you back 15 euros. A ride on the public transit system in the city is 70 cents.

The city is not completely free of tourists, but it is about as good as you will find in any European capital in the travel season. The majority of the people you encounter will be locals rather than tourists and the tourists are easy to avoid as for a smaller city, there is a lot to do. For example: If you go to any of the numerous museums, you are unlikely to run into tourists despite the fact that the exhibits are top notch. Tour groups are led passively around and do not do activities that require much effort or initiative. Do something that requires some work or initiative (such as hiking up to Kamzik TV and radio tower or visiting a museum such as Palffy Palace) and you’ll find yourself in a tourist-free zone.

As with all Eastern European capitals, the number of attractive women around is significantly higher than in the West and the men, as always, look unhealthy and poorly dressed. Any Westerner with decent looks and game would do quite well as passable English is widely spoken and language is, therefore, not an issue as one will find in a place like Brazil or Belarus.

A view toward old town Bratislava across the Danube River with Bratislava Castle in the background:

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One cool area along the Danube (and a nice place to unwind after the hassles of traveling) features a spot with truckloads of sand brought in to create an artificial beach. You can lounge in chairs next to the river and enjoy the wares offered by the nearby bar or get in on a game of sandy soccer or volleyball.

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Continue past the artificial beach and you’ll get to the UFO Bridge with its distinctive UFO top – a top that (get ready for it) houses the UFO Bar which supposedly offers solid views, but has gotten bad reviews.

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…And politically charged art.

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Here are some scenes from downtown Bratislava:

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Random (and usually humorous) bronze statues dot the Bratislava city landscape. Here are just two – “Rubberneck” and “Paparazzi” respectively.

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This is St. Martin’s Cathedral – site of the coronations of ten Hungarian kings, one queen and eight royal consorts over the period from 1563 to 1830 (if you’re into that sort of thing). Bratislava took on the position of the political and cultural center of that part of the Hungarian kingdom which was not occupied by the Turks.

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Grassalkovich Palace – built in 1760 as a summer palace for Count Anton Grassalkovich it is now the residence of the president of the Slovak Republic.

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Slovakia is a curious mix of German/Austrian culture and Italian culture. Here is an element of the German/Austrian culture at work. These cars were illegally parked on a sidewalk next to a university. No questions were asked. No citations were issued. Instead a team of tow trucks pulled up with the police accompanying them and simply picked the vehicles up with these cranes and drove them to impound yards.

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The Fountain of Friendship on Namestie Slobody Square – allegedly the site of the first flight by helicopter in 1897 by Jan Bahyl

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For a small country and a small capital, there is a great selection of quality museums to choose from – museums that all feature signs in English. Some I would recommend are the Museum of Clocks located in the House At the Good Shepherd, the Museum of Arms in St. Michael’s Tower which also features great views from the top if you go outside on the balcony (although the woman from whom we purchased our tickets here was a real poisonous old bitch to the degree that I had to tell her to go and fuck herself – and I am normally very polite and respectful when I travel). With a ticket to the Museum of Arms, you can also visit the Museum of Pharmacy located inside the Red Crayfish Pharmacy free of charge. There are many other museums as well including the Slovak Police Museum which looked interesting, but we did not have time to visit.

Two museums I would very strongly recommend in Bratislava are the Natural History Museum located along the river on Vajanskeho Nabrezie 2 and Palffy Palace located along Panska 19. Despite its name, Palffy Palace features mostly modern art. Count Janos Ferenc Palffy (d. 2 June 1908) was a significant art collector and concentrated the most precious works in the family palace. However, against the background of historical events – WW I and the break-up of the monarchy – the fate of perhaps the greatest collection of art in Central Europe was decided at the auction house as the Count’s descendants cashed in his collection (against the wishes outlined in his will). Below is some of the art in Palffy Palace today:

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The picture below does not do this display justice at all. You walk along a platform in the middle of the piece and are surrounded by a sense of infinity created by the clever use of mirrors. It truly is remarkable and a camera operating in two dimensions cannot possibly capture the three dimensional experience of having infinity spreading away from you in all directions. Don’t miss this one.

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There are several areas from which to get good views of the city, such as the Slavin military cemetery dominated by the Statue of Victory by Alexander Trizuljak. This site is the burial place of 6,845 soldiers of the Soviet Red Army who died “liberating” Bratislava in World War II.

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The view of Bratislava from up there…

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It’s also an area of consulates and nice homes, such as this trendy, modern one that I liked:

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For the best views though, hike up the mountain (Koliba) to Kamzik TV and radio tower.

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And look cool up on top of the tower…

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…While enjoying the great views…

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…And appreciating how forested Slovakia really is.

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And like I said, Austria is only a short train ride away…

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With decent scenery along the way:

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Vienna, aside from offering a vibrant employment market, also has attractions such as Schönbrunn Palace (used as the summer residence of the Hapsburgs from the 18th century onwards), Prater (a permanent carnival), Belvedere Palace, the Spanish Riding School, the Museum Quarter, the Albertina Art Gallery, the Hofburg Palace, or Imperial Palace (home of the Austrian Hapsburgs for 600 years) and much more.

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