The gateway to the Republic of Molossia:
As promised earlier, the scene report from Molossia is finally here…
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It’s a sad fact that Americans don’t get much international travel experience when compared to Europeans or those from other wealthy nations. Perhaps this is because the United States is a large country and there is already so much to see and do here? Or perhaps because most people believe that the only other countries that are conveniently close by are Mexico and Canada?
As such, these Americans might be surprised to learn that there exists a well-run and prosperous sovereign nation right in the heart of Nevada. These same individuals might be further shocked to know that this sovereign nation is presently at war. Yes, war. Serious business…
I am, obviously, referring to the Republic of Molossia. And there’s really no excuse for this ignorance about Molossia as Molossia has received extensive coverage in mainstream publications such as Vice, The Velvet Rocket and The Telegraph and has even been the central focus of an excellent film. Molossia has also received extensive television and radio news coverage and has even been featured in a Lonely Planet guidebook. And that does not even include the countless videos about Molossia on YouTube or blog posts about Molossia.
Hopefully, this series will further assist in raising Molossia’s profile.
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To quote the tourist brochure for Molossia:
“The Republic of Molossia (moe-LAAHSS-eeyah) is a sovereign, independent nation, located in and completely surrounded by territory of the United States. With a total area of 9956 sRN (2.5 ha / 6.3 ac), Molossia is one of the smallest nations on earth, but what it lacks in size it makes up for in spirit. A sense of humor characterizes most Molossian people, which, coupled with the casual and comfortable western lifestyle, makes Molossia an enjoyable place to visit.
Molossia is located in the western United States, a tiny enclave in the State of Nevada and a second enclave in Southern California.
The Molossian nation was established in 1977 I; it was a kingdom for over twenty years, followed by a People’s Democratic Republic, which then became today’s Republic in 1999 XXII. His Excellency, President Kevin Baugh is the current leader of our nation.
The Republic of Molossia has its own Navy, Naval Academy, Space Program, Railroad, Postal Service, Bank, tourist attractions, measurement system, holidays, online movie theater, online radio station, and even its own time zone.”
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His Excellency President Grand Admiral Colonel Doctor Kevin Baugh, President of Molossia, Protector of the Nation and Guardian of the People is seen below sporting the tricolor sash of the Molossian national flag, on the border between the United States and Molossia:
As is customary when entering any foreign country, to enter Molossia, one must first past through customs. The border post is manned by Fred, but His Excellency, President Kevin Baugh himself will kindly stamp your passport for you.
Certain contraband is not permitted within the borders of Molossia. Below the chief constable, Alexis, is reading the list of contraband to us:
Currently prohibited items are as follows:
Any tobacco products
Incandescent lightbulbs and plastic shopping bags
Catfish
Walruses
Onions and spinach
Anything from Texas (with the exception of Kelly Clarkson)
The rationale for prohibiting the above has been outlined in various government proclamations which can be found here.
As an interesting “oh by the way”, near the Molossia Customs Office one can see a fine example of the Molossian internal telecommunications network. I’m not sure if the NSA has tapped into this network or not… Oh, and, yes this is a working phone:
Once one has been processed through customs, one will see Republic Square to the right:
Republic Square is a popular spot for visiting heads of state to enjoy a photo op.
However, the commercial and cultural heart of Molossia swirls around Red Square.
Here one finds the headquarters of the Molossian Postal Service, the Bank of Molossia, the Office of the President, the Tiki Hut Bar and Grill (the official restaurant of Molossia) and more:
At the entrance of Red Square is a display board that provides good background information on Molossia and highlights significant moments in Molossian history. President Kevin Baugh will expand on the content for visitors:
Next to His Excellency, one can see a clock displaying Molossian Standard Time (19 minutes ahead of Pacific Standard Time and 41 minutes behind Mountain Standard Time) and in the background one can see Government House (the official residence of His Excellency and the First Lady).
Also on this end of Red Square is this wonderful direction sign for micronations:
Once one fully enters Red Square, the first building one will come to is the postal headquarters of Molossia – one of the oldest buildings in Molossia:
The interior of the post office… Ralph is on duty inside:
Some of the stamps of Molossia on display:
Just past the post office is the Molossia Trading Company…
Staffed by Trader Tom, one can stock up on everything from Molossia stickers to Molossia pins to Molossia coloring books to Molossia postcards to Molossia t-shirts (The online presence of the Molossia Trading Company can be found here).
I can speak with some authority on the quality of the t-shirts… I purchased a Molossia t-shirt in 2013 and wore it quite heavily in rough conditions in North Korea and elsewhere and it hung in there like a champion:
In the center of Red Square is a time capsule as well as a monument to peace known as the Peace Pole.
Behind these, one can find the Office of the President… His Excellency, standing at the entrance of his office, is telling us a story about Molossia in this picture below:
President Kevin Baugh hard at work at his desk:
As befits any dictator, the walls of His Excellency’s office are adorned with certificates, photos of him meeting with world leaders and other such demonstrations of achievement:
Among them is this photo of a state visit with the British Royal Family:
Now, in the interest of sharing all (as is our policy at The Velvet Rocket), there are vicious rumors circulating that the above picture was actually taken at London’s Madame Tussauds and that the “Royal Family” in the picture are simply wax figurines. However, given the eagerness the British Royal Family would undoubtedly display for a chance to meet the President and First Lady of Molossia, that seems highly implausible.
Past the Office of the President is the Bank of Molossia:
Molossian currency, the valora, is a “hard currency” in that it is backed by a physical asset. In the past, hard currencies have traditionally been linked to gold. However, Molossia is more sophisticated and rather than having its currency backed by a relatively useless and heavy mineral, the Molossian currency is backed by cookie dough. You can see some in the vault to the right of the banker, Herman:
A sign on the wall of the bank will list the current dollar/valora exchange rate:
Also on view at the bank is this board with samples of all of the different denominations of valora:
And past the Bank of Molossia is a newer addition to Molossia – the Tiki Hut Bar and Grill:
Its opening hours can be somewhat erratic, but the Tiki Hut Bar and Grill has some delicious looking items on the menu – such as the Molossolini. And, open or closed, the bar always has cool, refreshing complimentary bottles of “El Presidente” Molossian bottled water available.
The interior of the Tiki Hut:
The Tiki Hut also has this pleasant patio area outside:
Across Red Square from the Tiki Hut is Molossia’s Water Tower (the structure to the right):
Capping the end of Red Square is the Molossia Heroes Monument…
As alluded to in the introduction, regrettably, for even such a small nation, human nature does not change and, thus, conflict and war are never far away. Molossia has struggled through several wars and is currently engaged in the proverbial “long war” with East Germany.
The column honors those that have contributed to the rise of Molossia as well as those that have served in wars fought by Molossia, particularly the Mustachistan War and the ongoing War Against East Germany:
The heroes honored at the time of our visit were:
His Excellency, President Kevin Baugh
First Lady Adrianne Baugh
Emperor Norton I
Miranda Mc Elhiney
Admiral Erik White
Walt Disney
and
The heroes of the Mustachistan War
The heroes of the War Against East Germany
Further, the 30th of April is recognized as Heroes Day in Molossia – a national holiday (A full list of Molossia’s national holidays can be found here).
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See Part 2 of Visiting The Republic of Molossia HERE.
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