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Cheap Fun in the Nursing Home

jfp-zengel

I recently wrote about my grandfather, Fritz, and his adventures in the Sterling Inn.

That’s a picture of Fritz posted above…

Subsequent to that post, he and Irene moved up to an “assisted living” facility in Washington named Highgate – after being politely encouraged to depart the Sterling Inn. We dropped in to visit them during my most recent Northwest trip and as my parents were also in the area, they came along as well. My father attempted to make small talk with Fritz and the following conversation took place:

Jimmy (my father): So, Fritz, what do you keep yourself busy with now? Do you read a lot?

Fritz: No, I’ve read everything.

Jimmy: Well, do you watch TV?

Fritz: No, I can’t stand television.

Jimmy: Well, what do you do in your spare time then?

Fritz: Oh, I play with myself a lot. It’s cheap.

So, there you go everyone… The voice of wisdom says masturbation is the way to go for cheap fun. You heard it here first.

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